Why the Wagars are what they are

GOING INSANE

I am getting frustrated that my little baby wont come out. I still feel preg and my belly is still growing. I will be 12 weeks on monday...

Soon I Pray soon

Satan and his helpers!


HA HA HA HA!

Casey will laugh when he sees this,,

I was doing my internship to be a youth pastor and casey was a youth leader while finishing up college. We put on a play and I was Satan and everyone else were my helpers...Why is it that I Satan in one play and Mary for the whole church play.. I wanted to expand outside my comfort zone and BOY DID I! HA HA

Look how little Nalia Looks!


My little Nalia looks so small. About 4 months old she was on this pic.

Nalia Loves to feed herself!







Nalia oh Nalia!



Such a mess ..but what a cute mess....

Ashley and Kevin Engagemnet Party!


Ashley and Kevin will do great amazing things for the KINGDOM! I wanted to throw them a party to tell them how HAPPY i am that they are honoring God in all areas of PURITY,.. Not just not having sex I mean IT ALL!! and that is NOT common at all much these days....They are honoring God in their engagement and i know they will in their marriage. Wedding date is Dec. 14!!

Cant wait!!!


More thoughts....about miscarriage--im not sure if i use on or two "S" in that word.

SO since i heard that my little one is in heaven these are the things that have been very obvious to me:


* you really do find out who your true there for you kind of friends are, the ones that check on you to see how you are doing and who care to know how you are doing. Thanks those of you!-- You know who you are cause i tell you how thankful i am for you!

* Since the news my husband have drew closer but at the same time ALOT of crap is coming up in our marriage. I think that is the reason all this happened, TO get our attention about things that needed to me addressed. We will start going back to soo out guy who helps us learn to fight fair and communicate well when we disagree. We are both reading a book called "for men only, and " for women only....its hard to understand the opposite sex.... Hell sometimes its hard to understand myself and add the opposite sex to that can throw me for a loop.

* On wed. night I left for my 5th birth. She ended up having her baby Thur night at 9:56. She labored for a long long time! SHe did it natural and was ONE of the most intense labors i have ever been at! WOW GO JAMIE-- your amazing.

*My little Nalia is growing up so fast.

* at times i forget i will miscarry and think about how excited I am to have another baby.... WEIRD.

* On monday i will start 11 weeks. I have been having some cramping, but no blood...

* I am learning alot at this season in life and one of the biggest things i am learning is how lucky i am to have married such a Great man and daddy. He takes care of me in the ways that HE KNOWS HOW... its not always the ways i would want it but he is trying,,,, I learned how much a man Craves RESPECT in every area of life and every night trav would rather me say I respect you before we go to bed, or im proud of you rather that I love you... this is what i mean ...WEIRD! but if its what makes he happy then i will do whatever he wants... Love ya t.

*I am glad that thru this season in my life i have been able to connect with jess on a different level... God has his reasons for everything and this is one of them

* Happy birthday DENNY BAIN!

*

Thankful


I am thankful for my little Nalia Rain!

Ultra-sound #2


So i had another ultra-sound just to confirm things and be a peace-- No heartbeat and no movement.Thanks to my parents and Jess and Casey for making the drive to be there for us!

Trav and I are at peace about this and just hope to be preg by jan/feb



Littles toes fingers and hands.....





So here is the size of my baby-- my baby is actually closer to week 9 so even more developed than this little one. I will plan on holding him and looking at his little fingers and toes. I know it may sound weird to do that but its just what trav and I want and need, This is our BABY! just out a few to many months early...............

Life inside the mind of a girl before she will miscarry.


I know that when my baby comes out that I will hold him, He will be very little and fit into just the palm of my hand.
Today I went to the doc and they said just to wait things out since i was this to happen naturally. If nothings happens by Fri. i will go in for another ultra sound just to confirm things and be at peace.
I have such a peace that ALL IS WELL.. im my spirit I have a peace.
I got a Rosemary plant to plant once the baby comes, I will forever be reminded of his smell when i smell the plant. I was at home-depot and I told the ladt i need to find a plant that wont die!!! She said she was not sure about that this time of year..... I said IT CANT DIE! My baby is going to die and that plant cant die TOO!! I started to cry.. which suprised me but was good for me to get emotion out!
Peoples prayers are what are carrying trav and i thru it..THANKS

Up dated News from the DOCTOR!--NOT GOOD!

I FEEL one of the GREATEST LOSS I have ever FELT. Doctor said that my baby has no heartbeat---

My baby had no heartbeat so he is in HEAVEN, with his little cousin. This picture is the only that that gave me a peace. God has all this under control and I am not angry. When I say that I trust God I mean all of it and HIS plan for my life.

Here is BABY NUMBER 2!!

I know that I dont have a very big BUMp, but i cant wear my normal jeans w/o leaving button un-done so there is progress being done in the WOMB..


Here HE IS!! My sweet baby! I cant believe how developed he looked in the ultra sound! I am still waiting to get more details from the doc. about a accurate due date... Again we play the waiting game.... It now feels real that I am PREGNANT! WOW! My baby looks like a little puppy with a heart in the middle of it....ha


Praise GOD that this baby will make it to full term, a HEALTHY BABY BOY!